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Friday Joke on Saturday
tombig
Member Posts: 291
Only slightly off color but very humorous.
A middle-aged woman decides to have a face-lift for
her birthday. She spends $5000 and feels pretty good
about the results. On her way home she stops at a
newsstand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving she says
to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but
how old do youthink I am?" "About 32," was the reply. "I'm exactly 47, " the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl "How old do you think I am?" "I guess about 29." The woman replies. "Nope, I'm 47."
Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drugstore on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she proudly responds, "I am 47, but thank you."
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although,when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds kind of
forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands
under your bra. Then I can tell you exactly how old
you are." They waited in silence on the empty street
until curiosity got the best of her. She finally
blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead." He slips both
of his hands under her blouse and under her bra and
begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. After
a couple of minutes of this she says, "Okay, okay,
that's enough,.....how old am I?" He completes one
last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands
and says, "Madam, you are 47." Stunned and amazed, the
woman says, "That was incredible,...how could you
possibly know that from a feel of my breasts?"
The old man replies, "I was behind you in line at
McDonald's."
A middle-aged woman decides to have a face-lift for
her birthday. She spends $5000 and feels pretty good
about the results. On her way home she stops at a
newsstand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving she says
to the clerk, "I hope you don't mind my asking, but
how old do youthink I am?" "About 32," was the reply. "I'm exactly 47, " the woman says happily.
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl "How old do you think I am?" "I guess about 29." The woman replies. "Nope, I'm 47."
Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drugstore on her way down the street. She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question. The clerk, "Oh, I'd say 30." Again she proudly responds, "I am 47, but thank you."
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man the same question. He replies, "Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going. Although,when I was young, there was a sure way to tell how old a woman was. It sounds kind of
forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands
under your bra. Then I can tell you exactly how old
you are." They waited in silence on the empty street
until curiosity got the best of her. She finally
blurts out, "What the hell, go ahead." He slips both
of his hands under her blouse and under her bra and
begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. After
a couple of minutes of this she says, "Okay, okay,
that's enough,.....how old am I?" He completes one
last squeeze of her breasts, removes his hands
and says, "Madam, you are 47." Stunned and amazed, the
woman says, "That was incredible,...how could you
possibly know that from a feel of my breasts?"
The old man replies, "I was behind you in line at
McDonald's."
0
Comments
-
Tom, you must listen to 105.9 WCKG
as I know I just heard that joke on the 7:00 PM to 10:00 PM show on WCKG recently. Still very funny.
Glenn.0 -
Glenn,
I actually got it in an e-mail. I'm strictly an XRT guy for the last 25 yrs or so. Isn't WCKG mostly talk now? I remember when it was the premier rock station in the windy city. Anybody remember Boston or Foreigner.
Whew, I'm old!!. Tom0 -
Yea it's all talk in the day time.
I've followed WCKG thru their format change over the years. I used to listen to music all day but I enjoy the humurous talk more as i get older. CKG is doing Stearn, Kevin Mathews, Steve Dahl, and then the "Dirty sex show" with Karen Hand and Dr. Kelly, which is where I heard the joke word for word about a week ago. A wide variety of humor that helps relieve the tension of the day.
By the way, I do remember and enjoy Boston, Foreigner, and other great bands of that era. Used to listen to them on CKG when they were classic rock.0 -
Classic Rock??
I remember when they were new releases!!!!0 -
Kevin Mathews
One thing I've really missed since moving back to Iowa is Kevin Mathews. Used to listen to him on the LOOP way back when. Do you know if CKG has streaming audio over the internet? It would be great to hear his show again.
Thanks From an Iowa Kev Head
Terry H.0 -
You can get an internet replay of the show daily
about 2 hours after the show ends 2:00 PM Central time at www.kevhead.com0 -
Recently saw on Ed Sullivan
a 40 year old performance by the Beatles. A couple of days later on WXRT (Chicago) their "Instant Flashback" guess-the -year game, had a Talking Heads song from '79. It occurred to me that 1979 is closer to 1964 than it it is to 2004. Damn I feel old. Excuse me while I find the thread where we're complaining about physical ailments, or maybe a shuffleboard website.
Pardon my unexcused absence.
Howard Hansen Service Technician Extraordinaire0
This discussion has been closed.
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