excuse the language

Unknown

A young couple got married and went on their honeymoon. When they got back,the bride immediately called her mother. "Well," said her mother, " so how was the honeymoon?"
"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic..."
Suddenly she burst out crying. " But, mama, as soon as we returned, Brad started using the most horrible language-- things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these 4-letter words! You've got to take me home. PLEASE MAMA!"
"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! You need to stay with your husband and work this out. Now tell me? What could be so awful? WHAT 4-letter words?"
" Please don't make me tell ya mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed, they're just too awful! COME GET ME, PLEASE!!"
" Darling baby, you must tell me what has you so upset. Tell your mother these horrible 4- letter words!"
Sobbing, the bride said," Oh,Mama, he used the words like dust,wash,iron, and cook...."
"I'll pick you up in twenty minutes," said the mother.

Timco

Two guys out fishing in a boat. One asks the other if he has a light. Says yeah, in the tackle box. He gets it and it is HUGE. Asks how he got such a big lighter. Says there is a geni in the tackle box, so he opens the bottle. Out comes a very elderly geni with a hearing aid. Grants him a wish. He asks for a million bucks and poof, there are ducks everywhere quacking. Says, I didn't ask for a million DUCKS! Other says " do you think I asked for a huge BICK?"

No swearing...

Tim

Hvacman

LOL

Thank you both for making me grin at the end of an otherwise cold and dreary day!