Favorite customer quotes

just got off phone with customer who saids" The oil smell in the house is horrible so we turned off boiler. Can you come over and clean tonight?" I have done 2 emergency repairs for this guy in two years that is it. The front of the New Yorker Fr was about rusted off last year. Before you ask, it was not leaking nor were there evelated co levels in basement. I told him i would come look at but there would be a after hours charge. he could not figure out why. It is 1830 here. Office closes at 1600. go figure

a home owner story (swear to god it's true)

Last winter I scheduled a service call to address issues with the heating system in our 6 unit condo building (e.g., increasing fuel use, hissing vents in several units, uneven heating, ? years since last "annual" maintenance), which I specifically listed when I made the appointment. The day of the service call, the technician said that he was here to "clean the boiler."

I explained that I thought our system needed more than this--pointing, for example, to the noisy main vents that needed to be replaced. The tech disagreed, saying that he could tell that the vents were working just fine because they were “hissing up a storm.”

He also explained that the vents were on the return lines, not on the main, adding that only hot water systems have vents on the mains. I said that I was surprised to hear this, as I have a book about one-pipe steam systems that stresses the importance of these vents.

He replied that we don’t have a one-pipe system [Note: we most certainly do]—"it’s two-pipe, supply and return."

I said good-bye (presumably forever) and left him to clean the boiler in peace.

(I'm almost afraid to read through the boneheaded customer stories for fear of coming across something I've said or done.)

Call from a Condo Manager.

Owner (actually a Renter) reported an annoying noise from the fan/coil unit in the bedroom. Said it had kept her up 2 nites in a row.

Not a particularly urgent call, so we sent our Junior Tech. He was very circumspect about what he found when he reported to our Dispatcher. Not so quiet around the coffee pot next morning.

The tenant was a young lady. Must have been going thru a tough spot. The noise (vibrating) was coming from a certain appliance placed under the bed. With the switch still on.

She happened to come home as our Tech was leaving. He said it was all he could do to keep from rolling on the floor when she asked him - "What did you find?"

2nd favorite

Will you charge me for doing that? It was a no A/C call , after telling the customer to check the switch at the top of the stairs . My only answer was ,"DO you go to work , and not charge you boss ."

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Pager went off 6am

called ho back

"pipe to kitchen faucet is frozen"

We replied with standard lines turn heat up open cabinet doors leave faucet open. Said third on list for today if it does not thaw.

reply,

"thanks left message on regular plumbers machine, if you call and I do not answer I am all set"

guess were that job ticket went.



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I hate shot gunners

Call everyone..Had one yesterday..I called.

You are the second response, so I gave the work to the first guy..I say ok..hang up..2 hours later pager...Same guy..call again

First guy cancelled..can you come now? I say sure, quote rate.."What?!? the other guy was $xx.00" I say ok..call him, reply he can't come..me..I can and its xxx.00to get there, parts and repair labour extra at xx.00/hour and before you ask..no I can't do it "on the side"..him "you just screwing me because I need you, me " the yellow pages are full of contractors, let your fingers walk if you do not want to pay..He screams "I WILL YOU ROTTON SOB" and add a whole lot of other "F bombs" I remain calm because I do not care, this is the rate for a holiday, unless you are my customer, and its my install. They all have 5 year partts and labour warranty...

2 hours later..guess who is paging me...yep...same guy...call him back "no one else is available"

Now its the same rate, but I have been here before..so I tell him, its $xxx.00 to get there, parts and repair labour extra at $xx.00/hr, but I want the XXX.00 CASH when I get to the door, or I will not come in. I have been stiffed with checks (cancelled at the bank by owner) and credit cards (they called and cancelled transaction)..

He had it..

2 big slices of humble pie,but he had heat.

On a side note, my fave customer comment is " I (or my husband) tried to fix it, now its getting cold canyou come" the worst like that was about 10-12 years ago, I get there, its a Lennox Pulse, and EVERY COMPONENT ( and I meand EVERY) was in a box..he had try to test things, had a couple spare parts around, thought, must have missed wired part "X", figured he's "just start from scratch" and then couldn't read the wiring diagram because the Lennox has conectors (He was expecting a drawing showing each part and what coloured wire went where)

that was fun...

who never

you? or the pet?

Just kidding...your post was rad wrong the first time I looked at it although I imagine you would have written I never bit anyone mad dog