On Fathers and Sons

ScottMP

Got me thinking about my own Dad.

It reminded me how much my Dad ment to me. I lost my Dad nineteen years ago. He went in the hospital on my birthday, the day I was to start my own business. He had a stroke and lasted a week. We all thought that he would come back out of it, being the strong superman father that he was. We all look at our fathers that way. They can do anything.

He could'nt do that.

If a mother is the home, the warmth and the comfort. Then a father is the foundation. The strenght of the house. That which everything is built upon.

Every day I look at my sons, I think of my Dad. I think of him and I try to act like him. Its a huge job in my eyes. He allways taught me to do the right thing. I would know in my heart what was the right thing.

When my Dad died I cried for days. My world was shattered. But time passes and the pain becomes easier to bear. And yet when I type this I feel it all over again. I miss him alot.

This picture sits next to my desk at work and I look at it every day. Thats me in the middle and my brother Jeff. I had a good Dad.

Be a Dad.

Scott

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Wayco Wayne

Being a Dad

is the most important job you'll have. I've learned that even if you fall short sometimes, the kids look forward to forgiving and trying again. Time is the hardest thing to balance, esp when running a business. I was talking to a friend the other day and an insight popped out of my mouth before I had even thought about it. I told him that running a business was like being married a second time concurrently with the first. Fortunately, being in business has allowed me to make my own schedule and coach my sons sports teams and make all of the recitals and concerts. Where I think I fall short sometimes is when I'm home and thinking about work or too tired to show interest in what they're doing. Guess what? My Dad was the same way and I still love him. We almost lost him last year and he was given no chance to live. He made it through to everyone's amazement but still has to battle to keep on going. He's been a great example for me to follow. Thanks for sharing Scott.

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DanHolohan

Scott,

that's beautiful. Thanks.

John R. Hall

Knowing Scott

I've only known Scott briefly but I have learned one thing about this man -- he is a loving and caring father. Scott and I have shared stories about our kids and I'll never forget his efforts to buy a Pedro Martinez jersey for me to give to my son. That's class -- and it comes from knowing the importance of fatherhood.

Dad is my MOST important job title -- always will be.

munchkin-man

Dads

Almost any man can be a father but a good man can be a dad. In me eyes a man has to earn the name DAD it comes with the dedication to his family the rock always strong when it counts always being there unconditionally. I miss my dad also. I am in this business because of him. I was 25 when he passed from cancer and things were not quite relevent yet so he was my dad and we were working on being best friends.
The memories stand strong as I go along day to day repeating his wisdom and being a dad. I STILL HAVE HIM HERE IN MY HART FOREVER.

David Sutton_2

missing the role....

Scott, thank you ....

my dad had a plastering co. he worked 10-14 hrs a day sometimes 6-7 days a week...
i missed him.... him and my mom got a divorse when i was 7.
i swore i would not be like him...
i loved him and the time i did get was the best!!!
i have been a dad for 13 yrs now and last month my wife told me i missed the role! that i had turned into my father. i was working all the time, i had a job and side work... so she fired me from that and i have been spending time with my kids and my wife and i feel so good i wish someone told me this before or i wish i had listened to those who did...
my girls and boys love me and want me to be there and i am going to ....

i want to be remembered as the a dad that was there for them ... not as i remember my dad .. he died in 1990 and i think for him alot these days and i wish i could have him hug me and tell me that hes proud of the dad that i had become


dont miss the role guys... be the dad that hap was and scotts dad.. i going to work on this..

and Dan I AM HUGGING MY KIDS NOW! thank you ....David

Jackchips

Your story

ranks right up there with Scott's, Dave. Hugging the kids is always easier with a loving wife giving a nudge now and then.

Thanks for sharing.

John Abbott

Fathers

When I should have been a father I was too busy working, hunting, and fishing. You can never make up for all the things you should have done with your children when they were children.My greatest regret in life is that I was not there when I should have been.Family cruises with the grandchildren are no compensation for benign neglect when your children were in their formative years.

John

DanHolohan

John,

you're a beautiful man. Thanks for saying that.

Paul Pollets

How true...

It's amazing that it takes a loss to imprint how important the children are...and what they learn from us. For my brothers' kids, they participated in their first funeral. Each remarked how much they loved my Dad (they called him Hap) and how they liked being a part of the ceremony. I saw the future and the past at the same time on Sunday. It was an epiphany in many ways. It's also true that the child becomes father to the man.

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doug_10

Fathers and Sons...

Paul, in refernce to you seeing the different generations there it brings to mind a note that John Mellencamp wrote in his "Scarecrow" album that was dedicated to his late grandfather...that man had a nickname similar (Speck) to your Dad's.

He said "There is nothing more sad or glorious as the generations passing hands"

I read the previous posts in this great thread and was hesitant to say my own words...sometimes I'm out of line...then my Dad called me here at work a few minutes ago.

He called to simply see if I was bringing management and the kids to a family get-together on Sunday...nothing more, but it really got me thinking.

My Dad was orphaned with no siblings as a teenager, joined the military after ROTC at Niagara and served twenty one years defending our great country including two tours flying Hueys in 'Nam, raised six kids until Mom died and then married a widow and raised thirteen kids...moving every year as was the military way, and he NEVER complained. Talk about a strong foundation...

I would have been crushed by anything remotely close to what he lived through, and can only hope to be like him to my own children.

And I never even said thank you. I will on Sunday.

He was one of those people who didn't say too much, but when he spoke you had better have listened because you surely missed something. As proud and stubborn as an Irishman can get (with the temper, too), he gets embarassed when you praise him... but that's not going to stop me when I see him in four days.

Another reason why this is the greatest website around.

Thanks, Dan

Take Care, PJO

joel_14

dads

Thankfully i still have my dad lost mom when i was 26. today he was out installing a Carrier 19SEER A/C for us as we are having a crisis of biblical perportions. We took on more work only to loose 2 key employees. 1 to a union electronics shop and 1 who went back to school.
He's retired (kind of) and been redoing his summer house. kolbe windows, icynene insulation, all radiant and a Viessmann. Who says you can't teach an old dog new tricks??
He'll always be a better tech than i ever could be and somehow managed to be involved with scouts, and at games when I was a kid. I wish I could figure out how he did it. teaching full time, running a buisness on the side, and working on all sorts of trade issues with state goverment. He helped write the Mass refidgeration code and sits on the pipe fitting board. wish I could figure out how too balance it all.
He also is one of the few older people i know who doesn't say, "when I was young it was so tough!" He readilly admits that we have it much tougher. Consumers more demanding , mountains of paperwork, blood sucking lawyers and insurance companies.Plus lower profit margines than ever when put in perspective with living cost.He figured out a few years ago that in todays dollars to equall what he made in 67 a tech would need to be paid over 60 an hr with benifits on top.He says starting out now he doesn't know how he'd do it. Thier house with 25 acres of land cost about 15-20k then, today the land alone is probably a Million bucks. God love him for being progressive and not stuck in the past.

Jimmy Gillies

Dads.

As always there is a topic that's close to your heart on Dan's site.
I have a great Dad, I have never known him to swear, always full of love & great morals. He is not very well now & I miss speaking to him.
If I can be half the Dad to my son he is to me. I will be happy.
I grow up in a very matcho household, but love was all around. So everytime I meet my 12 year old son I kiss him full on the lips.
The more you give, the more you get.
So as Dan always says hug your kids.
Thanks for reading.
Kind regards.
Jimmy Gillies Scotland.

Jacob Myron_10

Without a father

you become a man in the house. I lost my father when I was I was 19. I helped raise my brothers and got married at 21.

I became a dad when I was 23. After 42 years of marriage and raising two sons and being the proud father and grand father of four I can now say I was good father.

I can not go into all the things that I think make me a good father. I know I am a good father and grand father as my sons still come over and hug and kiss me. My grand children never want me to leave and when they visit they do not want to go home.

I am a good father because my dad taught me no matter what life brings your family is the most important thing in the world.

Remember this you can not be a good father unless you are a good husband. Mom teaches the kids to love and without that nothing works.

My dad also taught me that the woman I marry is the person that will make me a real man. His words were marry a woman that can love and care, they are hard to come by and the search could be long. When you find it treasure it.

A sucessful dad needs a great wife and mom.


jake

Steve Minnich_1

I love my Dad so much...

Talked to him for about 30 minutes tonight-mostly trying to get him to bet a fin on whether the Cubbies would beat the Astros after being down 3-0 after three. He was too smart to take the bet. Moises Alou hit a two run dinger late in the game to win it.

He's been my hero since the day I can remember. He taught me how to be a man, a father, a husband, a hard worker, and almost everything I am today. He barely had an education but became a war hero, a writer, and a man of wisdom that isn't taught in schools.

I cherish every day that he is still here with me. I need him.

Just Stephen Michael

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ScottMP

The things I loved about my Dad

When he was a young boy he had to walk to piano practice on Sundays. He would walk down the R.R. tracks and some older kids said if he wanted to pass he had to fight them. He went that way every Sunday, it never occured to him to walk another way.

During WWII he was the radio man on a ship. His greatest thrill was decoding the message that said the war was over and then not saying a word while he walked to the captain and stood while he read the message.

In Viginia after the they got home, he and his two buddies went out to celebrate. They said the three of them would stick together. At a bar one guy got ina fight ( over a girl , of course ) and the other buddie jumped in to help. The MP's aressted the two of them and threw them in the paddy wagon. They saw my Dad and said what about all for one and one for all ? My Dad told the MP's to open the doors and in he climbed, off to the brigg.

When I was twelve I had a paper route. I told my Dad I wanted to start a bank account with the ten dollars I had made. He gave me ten and said here take this also. "No Dad I want to do this by myself" I said. He told me " As long as you want to be a good boy, and do good things I'll help you all you want. But if you want to be a bad boy, and do bad things You want get any help from me".

During my brief college stay, we played football against Maine Maritime. It was about a four hour drive and I was only a Freshman. I told my parents not to go since I would'nt get in anyway. Mr Dad said " Scott if you get in for two minutes I want to be there".

God I miss Him !

Scott


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DanHolohan

Your Dad

had it all figured out, Scott. What a wonderful man he was.