Guys who are plumb worth it...

Bill_14

but not a GOOD article...to enjoy reading.

Why don't other crafts, other trades, other professionals get picked on as much as the plumbing and heating trade?

Bill_14

Guys who are plumb worth it...

Good article from the 11/10/02 Denver Post.

http://www.denverpost.com/cda/article/print/0,1674,36%7E171%7E971825,00.html

leo g_24

bill

i loved it! i thought it was a great peice of parody! i'm still laughing!

leo g

Gary Fereday

NICE

Nice to have our story told so eleoquently

[Deleted User]

its our butt cracks

that do us in....got to luv 'dem suspenders.

Brian (Tankless) Wood

Can someone please tell me

how to cut & paste the address of the article/story into the address line on this darn puter of mine? I've tried everything, but nought works.

I'm on W-98 & Explorer, if that matters.

Thanks in advance fella's.

Fluff, does Heat-Miester know you're using his machine. The loose hairs on his chair, and in the keyboard, and statically stuck to the screen, from all the tail-waggin and scratchin, must be a giveaway. Or are you a dog that can do no wrong, and even sleeps on his bed and stuff.

Suppertime in Swampland.

Thanks for any help, Brian.

Bill_14

Here it is...

Denver Post
riding shotgun

Guys who are plumb worth it
By Sureva Towler
Special to The Denver Post


Sunday, November 10, 2002 - The world needs plumbers more than it needs poets. Any plumber will tell you so.

Plumbers are convinced that plumbing sustains the health of the nation. The history of democracy and the universe only can be explained by the availability and use of water. Use it or lose it, and shoot the guy who abuses it. Their creed is simple:

Righty tighty.

Lefty Lucy.

Don't bite your fingernails, and

Payday's on Friday.

Regardless of whether they are thin or paunchy, rack guns or fishing poles, plumbers are thick as thieves. They share parts and gossip. Most any time you can find them parked on Twenty Mile Road, leaning on the tailgates of their trucks fixing prices.

They have little black books that record the location of every grease trap and shutoff valve installed since Thomas Crapper wore knickers. They live by a strict code: Lower prices for little old ladies living on Social Security. Quadruple rates for clients who help. Never show the whites of your eyes to anyone who questions a bill.

Plumbers leave whiskey bottles under houses, forget pliers under sinks and hide "dead soldiers" - used water heaters - in city dumpsters. If you ask for a refund for an unused 45-cent wye, every plumber in the county will know by morning, and your service calls will go unanswered for life.

Call 911 if you ever find one who has all the parts for your job on the truck, one who can complete a project without 17 trips to True Value while the water is turned off.

Don't mess with the plumbers because they know things you might need to know. They saw the raccoon run into the water line at the Ramada but, because the builder was a know-it-all, they decided not to mention the corpse in the filter.

Everyone at the El Rancho knew and, to this day, none of their Old Ladies frequent the Ramada.

They knew the city should not have paved Oak Street before the water lines were replaced, but because the City Council were know-it-alls, there was no need to mention the leaks.

Plumbers don't have to be radio-dispatched because they have CBs, the real umbilical cord to what is, isn't or may be going on. Without it you might not know how the Plumbing Inspector reacted when he found a rubber snake wrapped around the service line in the darkest corner of the crawl space at Seventh and Laurel. The Building Inspector doesn't find that kind of stunt funny. The Boys at the Bar, on the other hand, think it's a knee-slapper, certainly worth another round.

Any plumber will tell you that the 11th Commandment demands the plumber be paid. Plumbers have "doctor's bags" for clients who don't pay. A "doctor's bag" contains paper towels to plug pipes, Nerf balls to stop up toilets and marbles to clog drains. Trust me, it's cheaper to pay the plumber than to hire a backhoe to remove a softball wrapped in duct tape from a vent pipe. Plumbers can really be quite unreasonable about their bills.

When a guy down the street decided not to pay for a new hot water heater, Crazydave pulled the switch on his electric box in the middle of a 10-degree-below freezing night. The house froze, pipes burst and the living room turned into an ice skating rink.

An ice cream parlor that failed to honor a sewer-cleaning bill found giant cockroaches dancing in the cookies 'n' cream. An antique popcorn wagon, transformed into a sandwich shoppe, was lassoed and hauled over a cliff. An unpaid sewer-cleaning bill covered the cost of the company Christmas party. No one remembers which of these capers landed Crazydave in the slammer.

Crazydave spent his jail time correcting plumbing sorrows the ACLU had been complaining about for years. He parked his big red plumbing truck behind the courthouse and upgraded the plumbing with the help of an embezzler and a rapist. The Boys at the Bar agreed he looked swell in an orange jumpsuit, and lined the alley to watch him jog two blocks to the hardware store for parts.

The County Commissioners had no problem paying for parts but, as the board chairman pointed out, "time" was precisely what he was doing in jail, so there was nowayinhell it could it be considered billable.

Crazydave was still in the slammer when the cops and the bank, which held the paper, realized the popcorn wagon has headquartered the biggest drug ring in town. It was a big time for the Boys at the Bar because they seldom got to celebrate the sheriff and bank president getting stiffed on the same day.

Sureva Towler writes from her homes in Steamboat Springs and Lawrence, Kan.

keith

Sounds like

Sureva is an insider. She has the inside scoop on what makes us tick. Darn that Sureva she must ahve gotten her 2 homes and decided to blow the whistle on the rest of us before we have a chance to own 2 homes. I don't know about you guys but I'm going back and rewrite the rules of engagement. Nothing like a double crosser to get you thinking of a change in strategy.

Tones_2

\"Poop goes down, Stink goes up\".....................

Doesn't this rule come after "Lefty Lucy" in the above creed?

........Tones

Mark J Strawcutter

my uncle

tought me that the only rule you need to know about plumbing is:

"hot goes on the left, cold on the right, and s**t flows downhill"

Mark

nick z.

Re minds me of a "someone"I know who went to work for a lady who had a bad reputation for paying. After doing doing many plumbing repairs which took most of the day, the lady suddenly had to leave. But told me I mean this guy to just lock the door behind him and leave the bill. Well' you know how those darn old toilet floats are after you replace them if you don't have the chain set just right they might leak a lil and make the toilet run once in awhile.After acouple days she called this guy back to fix the toilet."Sure just leave my check." he said.