Having a Bad Day?

Paul Pollets

Forwarded from Mikvaman:

Next time you have a bad day at work.. Think of this guy.


Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana.

He performs underwater repairs on off shore drilling rigs. Below is the E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial Ft.Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.


Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office.


I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.



Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.


As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit.

This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose,which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.

What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So of course, I scratched it.

This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn.

I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.

Now since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate.

When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.

His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other,divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive.


I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.


So the next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."

Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?



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Constantin

Very funny...

...but methinks it is a legend. The status is undetermined, but my recollection of the suits those guys use is that the warming fluid does not touch their skin directly. I'd hope that they would not subject the poor guys in those suits to salt water on bare skin. Makes any nick, scratch, etc. that much less bearable to deal with.

ScottMP

Two things Paul

1) Allthough funny this is probable one of those urban myths , since I got this as an e-mail about three years ago.

2) I am having a bad day, matter of fact a bad week !!!
It just came to a head as I was to go into Boston tonight and see Donald Fagen in concert. They cancelled it untill Saturday night and I won't be here . I SOOOOOO wanted to see a good live show.

Scott

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jackchips_2

Scott,

I wish there was a live cam here in my office so you could watch the digitzer pen glide silently over the estimating board while I hum "Here comes the sun".

Hopefully, that would cheer you up. :-))

Jack

Paul Pollets

Corrections:

Here's the link from Urban Legends trying to corroborate the story:

http://www.snopes.com/humor/letters/diver.htm

Yes, all items are suspect!

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Brian (Tankless)

You are correct, Constantin.

A good story, but saltwater never ever comes in contact with these divers.

Divers at Global Divers (a division of Global Industries) enjoy a very sophisticated form of radiant/conductive heat to keep them toasty in their underwater environment.

1. They are heated via HX's, and all water is fresh water, and the equipment costs an awful lot more than $20,000. I have the inside-track on this, because I was personally responsible for some of the maintenance on this equipment. As barge electrician,I worked with the extremely competent "dive-tech's" making sure that the dive-support equipment worked flawlessly.

Myth debunked.

Brian in GOM (Gulf of Mexico) land.

P.S. I never met a diver called Brian at Global Divers, I was the only Brian