Uses for Fruit/Christmas cake

Steve M_2

In early January, the town of Manitou Springs outside of Colorado Springs, has an annual Fruitcake Toss. No kiddin'! http://www.2camels.com/festival48.php3

leo g_13

Well,

the authorities keep on telling us up here in the Pacific Northwest, that we should be prepared for the big earthquake. Well, i was looking at some fruit cake, that I know we have had sitting in a cupboard for at least 5 years, and the stuff looks as good? as the day we got it!

This got me to thinking, here is the perfect solution for those emergency food supplies that we are supposed to have (they even have this kind of packages at our kids' schools now). I feel that this stuff will even outlast Elven Lambas bread!

It can get crushed and still eaten, you could use it like bricks for a quicky shelter, if someone is trying to loot your area, a well placed throw, right between the perps eyes should knock em down!

I no longer am worried about a disaster, just hope that most of my old aunts don't pass on to quick now, because we need their recipes!

Leo G

To Learn More About This Professional, Click Here to Visit Their Ad in "Find A Professional"

Jason_15

YES

Excellent ideas, Leo !!!

John R. Hall

Energy source?

I wonder if it is possible to compress old fruitcakes into combustible pellets and use them as an alternative energy source. Then we can create a cottage industry for fruitcake furnaces. And instead of worrying about CO from improper combustion of the fruitcake pellets, all we would have to worry about would be the smell of the green jellied things.

I've got to lay off the egg nog.

Anna Conda

Fruitcake furnaces! What a brilliant idea! We're always wondering what to do about the fruitcakes we encounter at work...

..... oh, you meant confectionary. My bad. ^_~

Bill_24

This thread is very funny, my grandmother, god bless her 96 year old heart, makes me and all my other neices and nephews her variation of fruitcake every year for christmas. Except she calls it poorman's bread, like that's a disguise, I'm not kidding you when I tell you this but a few years back I weighed mine and no kidding this thing weighed 12 lbs. I've been storing them in the attic so my question is what is the R value? Maybe I can get the other hidden fruitcakes and finally finish my insulation in the attic.

leo g_13

John.

you'd probably need a press the size of the one that crushed the first terminator.

Actually, I don't believe that a press has been invented yet that could accomplish what you describe!!!!

Leo G

To Learn More About This Professional, Click Here to Visit Their Ad in "Find A Professional"

Uni R

R-Value

They have an exceptionally low R-Value. Keep it inside your building envelope to add mass or better yet, run some PEX through it and use them as emmitters.

jerry scharf_3

How do you

keep the furnace from spitting them out unburned? Even the feeder may refuse to work.

As for the ram press, I'm just imagining getting the pellet out after it got squeezed. It's just not nice to do that to equipment.

jerry

John S.

Great post...

but, Be careful what you all wish for. Gunk is developing a fool-proof boiler seal from leftover fruitcakes. So far they've successfully ran pressure tests of up to 50 psi. They're so confident in the new product that they've come up with their own recipe, hoping to offer a guarantee that the sealer will outlast ANY cast iron boiler.

They also claim that a bonus side-effect is the lowering of pH due high concentrations of citric acid.

To Learn More About This Professional, Click Here to Visit Their Ad in "Find A Professional"

Guy_6

Fruitcake

I have always felt that there is only a limited number of fruitcakes (the food, not the people) out there. They jusk continue to be re-gifted. I am sure that there are fruitcakes with more mileage on them than most commercial aircraft.

JimGPE_17

HEY!!!!!!

ALL RIGHT YOU GUYS, KNOCK IT OFF!! I LIKE FRUIT CAKES! (Yes, I know I'm yelling, but I feel passionately about this) I JUST SPENT $30 US ON ONE, THAT'S HOW MUCH I LIKE FRUIT CAKE!!!! THIRTY BUCKS WORTH!!!

Y'ALL JUST SHIP 'EM OFF TO ME, THE HEAVIER THE BETTER!!!! I'LL GIVE THEM A GOOD HOME FOR JUST AS LONG AS IT TAKES ME TO EAT THEM!

[Oh man, I pitty my poor UPS guy! He's in for it now! Hope he has one of those lumbar support belts and helper springs on his truck! He he he!]

Cosmo_3

Whats a matter with you guys!

I believe that it is common knowledge that the first alternate use for a fruitcake was a wheelchock


Cosmo Valavanis

Dependable P.H.C. Inc.

ScottMP

A few years back

I was at my in-laws house and made a fruitcake joke.

All I got was blank stares ....

Apparantly they like these things.

Scott

To Learn More About This Professional, Click Here to Visit Their Ad in "Find A Professional"

Ragu

More Uses....

Threw one down the cellar stairs into a flooded basement; bone dry in about an hour. Couldn't get it out though... too heavy.

Threw one in the woodstove last January. Burned for a week.

Used one for a boat anchor once. Held the boat in place but all the lobsters disappeared from the bay.

Sent one to my boss one year. Got fired the next day.

Tried to carry one onto a plane. Got interrogated for 4 hours.

I think next year I'll try a Haagis.

Guy_6

Recepie


Best Fruit Cake Ever

1 cup butter
1 tsp. salt
1 cup sugar
lemon juice
4 large eggs
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup dried fruit
nuts
1 tsp. baking powder
1 or 2 quarts whiskey
1 tsp. baking soda

Before you start, sample the whiskey to check for quality. Good isn't it? Now go ahead. Select a large mixing bowl, measuring cup, ect. Check the whiskey again, as it must be just right. To make sure that the whiskey is of the highest quality, pour one level cup into a glass and drink it as fast as you can. Repeat. With an electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add 1 tsp of thugar and beat again. Meanwhile, make sure that the whiskey is of the finest quality. Cry another tup. Open 2nd quart if necessary. Add 2 large leggs, 2 cups of fried druit and beat till high. If druit gets stuck in the beaters, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the whiskey again, thecking for tonsicisity. Then sift 2 cups of salt, or anything, it really doesn't matter. Sample the whiskey. Sift 1/2 pint lemon juice. Fold in chopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 babblespoon of brown thugar, or whatever color you can find, and wix mell. Grease oven and turn cake pan to 350 degrees. Now pour the whole mess into the coven and ake. Check the whiskey again, and bo to ged